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08 April 2008 @ 08:54 am
to say nothing of the dog  
My friend and I made a breakfast date.

a-doll: i'll bring the cheese and crackers, you bring the wine
me: but who'll bring the bulldog?!
a-doll: he'll bring himself if he knows what's good for him

I'm so glad I have friends who understand the need for Cyril bulldogs at breakfast.

Last week I went to my first rugby match ever. This is more of an achievement than it sounds, given that my brother plays it and my dad coaches it and it's kind of a national obsession. I was heartily amused, especially by the Dirty Dancing moves. (Dad called it a line-out; at least I think he did - he was kind of choking at the time.) And - the places they stick their hands! The sitting-on of faces! Gayest thing since porn, seriously.

But that's not the point of my story. I got a lift (in America you call this 'getting a ride', hey? That's so dirty) with my friend - let's call her Em - and her boyfriend - let's call him ... Mr Ice-Cream Man. Because he looks like what would happen if you dropped a strawberry ice-cream cone and turned it into a person.

On the trip home, during a lull in the conversation, Mr Ice-Cream Man suddenly pipes up.

mr ice-cream man: Rachel, what perfume are you wearing? It's lovely. I can smell it from here.
me: *flails silently and mentally* Oh, um. Um. Hypnose, I think? Um. (It was Ange ou Demon, actually, but whatever. Good thing I lied anyway, as it turned out.)
em: Mr ice-cream man'll remember that so he can buy it. Then I can smell like Rachel!
me: And Rachel's mom, because she wears it too.


Does anyone else think that entire exchange was just - weird?

My mother did, mainly because I whine to her about Mr Ice-Cream Man a lot. He'd totally be a sleazebag if he weren't, you know, an ice-cream man. Once Em told me that Mr Ice-Cream Man tells her so often that I'm pretty that she's starting to get jealous. And she giggled. Again: what.

My awesome friend said Em's reply was weirder than Mr Ice-Cream Man's comment. A-doll said I shouldn't get so freaked out by compliments, but I suppose I just have an inherent distrust of flattery. Particularly when it's directed at me.

Current Mood: confusedconfused
Current Music: the middle (jimmy eat world)
Liblibgirl on April 8th, 2008 08:18 am (UTC)
I'm sure you're both gorgeous and witty, but I find his comment rather pervy.

Hehe on the getting a ride thing, I'd never considered it that way before.

Rugby--totally slashy ;).
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Audrey Hepburnscoradh on April 8th, 2008 10:15 am (UTC)
Yeah, same here! And I'm neither quite so gorgeous nor so witty as to warrant it. I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks so!

Ride is a verb for ... well, you figure it out ... here.

Liblibgirl on April 8th, 2008 10:36 am (UTC)
Oh, I totally get the "ride" comparison, it's used here all the time, I just hadn't paired the two up in my mind before ;).
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 8th, 2008 12:34 pm (UTC)
Here's, it's literally: did you get the ride off her? (If you are a complete boor, that is. There are more delicate ways to put it, even if the mentality remains the same.)
Lisanitedula on April 8th, 2008 08:28 am (UTC)
I think Mr Ice-Cream Man is indeed a sleazebag.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Beautiful human being/potatoscoradh on April 8th, 2008 10:15 am (UTC)
Three to one for perviness. For the win!
vickevirevickevire on April 8th, 2008 08:34 am (UTC)
I probably shouldn't say this, especially since you don't know me (also, I imagine it could give you a serious "ewwww!" moment), but they obviously want a threesome!

I mean, the giggling.

Don't take me too seriously, tho. Internet has made my mind waaaay too dirty. ;)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Eddie Izzard: So ... yeahscoradh on April 8th, 2008 10:16 am (UTC)
... I ... sometimesthinkthattoo. *scrubs brain* ANDAND she's brought up threesomes before - 'Mr Ice-Cream Man would LOVE ONE OMG'. I think I'd forgotten that on purpose due to the mind-trauma.

Same here, but I think some people are dirty just by nature.
vickevirevickevire on April 8th, 2008 12:49 pm (UTC)
OMG, lol. How awkward. Or, maybe it's only me that thinks spending time with a couple who is trying to persue you to a threesome is awkward. Maybe it's fun?

every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 8th, 2008 01:08 pm (UTC)
It would be if they were, like, remotely hot. Which they are not.
mrsquizzical: boyhandsmrsquizzical on April 8th, 2008 08:57 am (UTC)
i like to get my mrQ frothing by telling him just how homoerotic rugby is. he was in the first... whatever it is... at his private (public to you) boys' school. 'not that there's anything wrong with that.'

and eep at the mr ice-cream man conversation. (except that dear rupert is an ice-cream man so i'd rather not have negative associations to the name!)

ps. looks like the ticket is a go. *flail*
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: I'd tap that ♥scoradh on April 8th, 2008 10:18 am (UTC)
Dude. They. Stick their hands. Between other men's legs! What else am I supposed to read into that? As for the so-called line-out: I would be iffy about having that many people's hands around my crotch, no matter if it is in the name of sport...

I could just say he's fat and ugly, but that's not terribly original. :D

omg yay for you! boo for me :(
grey_hunter on April 8th, 2008 09:55 am (UTC)
Well, if you're freaked out then you should perhaps reciprocate... by telling him that thing about the ice cream... :P
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Bookishscoradh on April 8th, 2008 10:18 am (UTC)
Oh gosh no, I never say mean things to people's faces. That's ... mean.
Riakessie on April 8th, 2008 11:04 am (UTC)
jdhsajdhsajdh Oh man. That must have been so awkward. D:

(Randomly, I remember I really liked the ad for Ange ou Demon.)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: In ur bedscoradh on April 8th, 2008 12:36 pm (UTC)
It felt incredibly awkward, but I wasn't sure if I could adequately convey it to people afterwards. I seem to have succeeded, though.

It was a random Christmas present - I've only ever seen the Nicole Kidman ad for Chanel No. 5. My life, so full of woe.
(Deleted comment)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Heart treescoradh on April 8th, 2008 12:37 pm (UTC)
I have to admit I kind of love the term 'shirt-lifter'. It conjures up all sorts of vaguely illicit/erotic but not quite tawdry things. I think if I were gay I wouldn't mind being called that. Ergo I must work it into my next fic! Yes!
jehnt: st - ds9 - kira nerysjehnt on April 8th, 2008 12:23 pm (UTC)
lol IN AMERICA. And yeah it does sound kind of dirty. And it does inspire grade-school snickers occasionally.

Also, Mr. Ice-Cream Man's comment was definitely weird. o_0
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Kitties: in ur quantum box... maybescoradh on April 8th, 2008 12:39 pm (UTC)
I recall in primary school we couldn't say the word 'it.' Ever. Just imagine, if you will, the linguistic contortions that resulted in.

THANK YOU. It so was, right?
jehntjehnt on April 9th, 2008 02:29 am (UTC)

I frequently wear vanilla perfume, and I get weird comments from people being like "oooh, you smell like I should just be eating you" and I'm always like, "uhhhhh? rephrase? please?" This guy's comment seemed kind of like that... except CREEPIER.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Converse kissscoradh on April 9th, 2008 11:14 am (UTC)
Mmm, vanilla. Deffo one of the nicest smells ever. It reminds me of cookies.

I suppose at least it's not 'eating you out'? Small mercies, small mercies...
woman who reads too muchboxofdelights on April 8th, 2008 02:17 pm (UTC)
I'm afraid she wants you. Probably more as a present for the boyfriend than for herself.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: SGA: cutescoradh on April 8th, 2008 08:31 pm (UTC)
Oh my GOD, no. It's not that I don't have a chick exception, it's that I don't have an ugly exception.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 8th, 2008 09:55 pm (UTC)



Edited at 2008-04-08 09:58 pm (UTC)
on a yellow spaceship: dodoo_glorianna on April 10th, 2008 12:38 am (UTC)
Whoa?! How d'you do that? :)

Mr. Ice-cream Man sounds just a tad suspicious. The perfume comment wouldn't have rung any bells in my head except for what his girlfriend ended up saying. That's just weird. Then you add in the remaining bits and...well, *sad face*.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: JK on DHscoradh on April 10th, 2008 08:09 am (UTC)
lol I was just messing with those to see which looked better as a paragraph break! To get them put in & and ;, with hearts/spades/clubs in the middle and no spaces.

Yeah: some people got the weirdness of the perfume bit alone, but everyone got the weirdness of her comment. Because it was a bloody WEIRDASS COMMENT, omg.

Edited at 2008-04-10 08:11 am (UTC)