Today, I got up at two in the afternoon and had a bubble bath (green). Mmm, fun.
When my mother enquired as to my non-appearance at college on a day of college, this conversation ensued.
ME: (loftily) I took the day off to celebrate Thanksgiving, as my religion requires me to do.
MOTHER: Which religion is this, then? I thought you were an atheist. That's what you said last week.
MOTHER: That's a religion?
ME: Yes. About...lots of people live there, too.
MOTHER: (suspiciously) Ah. Right. Things become clear //I always knew you were a few ants short of a picnic and now I'm proved right! Yess!//. Pity your religion couldn't, say, point you in the direction of that huge pile of your ironing over there.
ME: Mother! On a day of, er, celebration! Take thy blasphemous self away from me before I am infected with your, er, sin. Please. Er.
Gods bless America.
(And like a good little girl, I started typing up chapter six of A City Visible But Unseen [also, hail my usage of italics! For once not being lazy-ass and cheating with quotation marks! Er. And also er.]
...but got bored after four pages. Oh dear.)