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30 January 2009 @ 08:29 pm
words? why, he could almost make 'em speak  
I welcome concrit. I have anon commenting on and IP addresses mean as much to me as algebra (i.e. nothing). I accept that people mightn't like what I write. It upsets me, of course, but it's neither my fault nor theirs. Sometimes I feel called upon to justify my reasons for writing something because I believe it was the right way; other times, I go off and think about it and realise the other person was right. In those cases I'm disappointed with myself, but never angry with them.

I guess I thought I'd put that out there. To my knowledge I've never got flamed, but I have got some insightful (read: cutting) commentary in my time. To that end, I've decided to make this post the TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OF MY WRITING POST. (Not the &fic; school of thought, but the 'what I'd change if it were me' and 'edit plz omg' ones.)

The only prerequisite for posting is that you've read something I've written - just one thing. I look on fanfic as the creative writing course I never had; I've learned so much from betas. However, this is a chance for people to have their say, out of the context of any one story. (Of course, if you feel like giving actual examples, that'd be awesome too.) Like I said, it can all be anon. You can flame if you want, but that's not going to help me get better, though it certainly might make me cry. I'm always looking to improve and I want to do this before I lose my nerve!

Current Mood: nervousnervous
Current Music: paper planes // mia
(Anonymous) on January 30th, 2009 08:46 pm (UTC)
You're quite prolific, whatever you say, and the HP fic and the original fic makes me swoon. I tend to skip over the bandom stuff and the book glomps - I'm in this for the HP fic and the original, which is some of the best in fandom. Your original stuff is good because it is self-indulgent, in the way that original slash is often self-indulgent, but you have such a good grasp of characterization that the slash almost (almost) takes a backseat to the development of the story.

Yeah, okay, this is pretty much an entreaty to write more original slash, cos no one else does it like you do.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Disney: Lion King splashscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:07 am (UTC)
*taps fingers* I'm not entirely sure 'self-indulgent' is a good thing, even in the context you mention. However, I think I see what you mean - I don't try to push the boat out with original fic. I write it the exact same way as fanfic, which is littered with original characters in any case.

lol on the book glomps, they are not at all considered 'writing' (at least by me). Ranting is more like it.
I like you.cyclogenesis on January 30th, 2009 08:48 pm (UTC)
I've already told you what I thought with my name behind it and if you want me to I always will. \o/ I think you have an awesome attitude about this, since college I've thought that many fic writers would benefit from even one creative writing workshop at a university level - more than just as a way to get concrit on your own stuff, but as a way to learn to give it. And also because taking just one college level course will make you aware of just how much you've learned as a fic writer, and just how ahead you are compared to nonfannish peers. I hope you get some good comments here!
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Art: socksscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:02 am (UTC)
I've already told you what I thought with my name behind it and if you want me to I always will.

Yes please! The way I look at it, anything can be awesome - SMeyer is techically a wonderful writer - but actual critism requires a far higher level of engagement.

My problems, as I see them, are:

1) Too much dialogue. Mom said my writing reads like a movie, which is true, and troubling.
2) Too many big words! But I swear this is because I think it's funny - like, the epitome of sarcasm is using three big words fast and in a row, leaving people going 'wha...?' (imo, at least). I should try writing a story using nothing but tiny words...
3) The endings - although that's been improved by actual, you know, editing.

Keep on truckin'!
(Deleted comment)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Art: princessscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:03 am (UTC)
Oh, I totally agree there. I should have put it in the post, actually. It's been getting better of late, because murklins insists that I rewrite endings several times - something I never did before.
Allikaallika on January 30th, 2009 10:12 pm (UTC)
The only advice I can give you is to NOT have Boy Heroes throw themselves into nuclear reactors in the future.
(OMG, you should have seen my FACE! It was probably HiLaRiOuS.)
Otherwise, you're good. XD
jacked up on cheap champagne: kung fumizbean on January 31st, 2009 12:26 am (UTC)
Hee! That was the exact reaction I had to that fic.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Art: white dressscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:04 am (UTC)
lol I don't think I can actually make any promises on that one ... it's too fun!
high and mighty mansplaining robotrimestock on January 30th, 2009 10:56 pm (UTC)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: bands PATD Ryroscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:04 am (UTC)
(Deleted comment)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Art: Bookishscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:08 am (UTC)

Your writing is always worth reading

just keep writing, and I will keep reading

ilu. And I'm kind of teary now - granted this has a multifactorial aetiology, lol - but thank you. Thank you so much. ♥ ♥ ♥
jacked up on cheap champagnemizbean on January 31st, 2009 12:27 am (UTC)
My advise it to keep writing. That way more of us get to enjoy your work.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: bands PATD Joncer prettiscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:09 am (UTC)
I am, don't worry! I just have this little time management problem when it comes to finishing things...
(Deleted comment)
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Art: owlsscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:12 am (UTC)
I do have this habit of killing Harry. I think it's a subtle mental dig at JK, for not having the balls to do it herself. Or something.

I'm glad you like my writing, obviously! And I would say, of the three original fics here, only Elephants is worth reading (Fool's Gold is better, but people don't like it; and the rugby one is just shit). But ... is there anything you'd like to say about it that's less than complimentary? I won't be mad, I swear! :D

Edited at 2009-01-31 11:12 am (UTC)
wayoffbasewayoffbase on January 31st, 2009 04:42 am (UTC)
Umm, basically, your writing is awesome. The end. =D
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Kitties: self cleaning catsscoradh on January 31st, 2009 11:10 am (UTC)
:D You wouldn't change a thing?
wayoffbasewayoffbase on February 1st, 2009 07:34 am (UTC)
Umm, maybe like the person above said, less 'boy heroes throwing themselves into nuclear reactors'? =P But other than that,I can't think of anything. I love the flow of your writing, if that makes sense. I never get thrown out by a weird sentence or anything, which is awesome.
(Anonymous) on April 15th, 2009 10:38 pm (UTC)
DIY Messiah
Found your story recommended and I thought I'll give it a chance. Glad that I did. As a whole the story was fantastic, original and different. The characterize of the characters was done wonderfully and you couldn't help but to love them. Thanks for the read.
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: halowrites: pink housescoradh on April 16th, 2009 07:20 pm (UTC)
Re: DIY Messiah
lol, not quite the stern concrit I was expecting! But thank you anyway. :D
(Anonymous) on June 15th, 2009 02:09 pm (UTC)
so i just spent my entire weekend basically reading all your HP and original fics. and i think i'm a little bit in love, especially with the original fics. you're definitely one of the best writers i've found in my internet sojourns thus far.

i have noticed though, that you have a tendency to write a couple really likable, earnest characters but then leave the background characters appallingly petty, oblivious, or cruel. particularly in the road less traveled and three steps back. while i have nothing against an 'us against the world' fic, i've never met anybody as unilaterally mean-spirited as rose, hugo, or james.

on the plus side, you use amazing vocabulary. i can't tell if you use a thesaurus or you're just naturally articulate. i've almost never had to pick up a dictionary in all of fanfic but i find myself doing just that repeatedly when i read your fics. so kudos :)

and i love your names, especially in the original fics. are they actual names or did you make them up?

and i love your quotes and poems, the ones you put at the beginning of each chapter, especially the e.e. cummings. i hate it when writers put stuff like 'te amo como se aman cietas cosas oscuras' sure its a lovely poem but unequivocally sappy.

in conclusion, you're a wonderful writer, i wish that you were writing more HP fic but i guess i'll survive without it. best of luck, may you always have more stories in your head than you know what to do with
vicious_seagullvicious_seagull on June 15th, 2009 02:10 pm (UTC)
sorry that one above wasn't supposed to be anonymous, i'm just bad at commenting
every Starbucks should have a polar bear: Art: blue bustierscoradh on June 15th, 2009 07:44 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much for your feedback! And I wouldn't have minded if you stayed anon, either, but this way is good too, if there's anything else you want to say. :D

In the Next Gen fic, those characters were supposed to be unlikeable. I mean, I was trying to write them that way. If it comes off as negligence, that just means I have more to work on! But writing sweet, happy characters all the time is kinda ... boring.

A few years ago, I started writing in wordpad as opposed to Microsoft Word specifically SO I wouldn't have access to a thesaurus. I spent too much time agonising over tiny word substitutions. Ergo, yes, all those words are outta my head. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not!

In the original fics, they're trad Irish names, for the most part. I have an ancient baby-naming book that I use when I'm stuck.

may you always have more stories in your head than you know what to do with

Thank you! That is just the sweetest (and slightly evillest) thought. ♥
(Anonymous) on February 12th, 2010 04:19 pm (UTC)
You keep killing Harry! Really, half your stories end with me blubbing like a baby.

Other than that? Nothing, you're a brilliant writer.
e0landee0lande on June 24th, 2010 09:21 pm (UTC)
I've only read one of your fics so far. Quantum leap.
I thought the beginning was wuite vague and crack-y but after quarter way through it got better and better.
You didn't go too in depth on the characters.

That was style and writing comment here comes the feeling.
I though it had an absolutely beatutiful (but mushy) ending. I'm still have the teartracks to prove my fondness for HD...

Now I'm off to read your other fic!!
khalulukhalulu on March 2nd, 2011 06:12 am (UTC)
a very favorite
hi, I only discovered slash fanfiction about a year and half ago - I read HP mostly - and your Snakes and Ladders was one of the first good ones I ever read and one of my favorites to this day - I re-read it or parts of it often. It's pretty much flawless in my opinion (though at times I wondered how Wystan got bitten and wanted some reassurance that it's just coincidence that Remus lives there. Also, how come Wystan couldn't get Wolfsbane from wherever Remus gets it?) Wystan is the best kid in HP. (Angus is a good second.) The build-up of attraction is lovely and the food fight is great, also Draco on the old firebolt.

I also like DIY Messiah and parts of Interview with a Hero very much. Didn't like the twins or the evil Blaise part, but really really liked so much else about it. Loved that Draco loved Harry being a sincere kisser. Loved that he stuck around through the throwing-up. Loved the buying the purple sheets. Loved Harry knowing who he was.

Love what you said about, basically, beauty being in the eye of the beholder.

I don't think writing too much dialogue is a problem if it's good dialogue, and yours is.

Write on!

(Anonymous) on August 19th, 2011 03:13 pm (UTC)
Hi there! I think you're a wonderful writer, and I could only dream of being as talented as you.

Having said that, I will also say that I found this post after feeling deeply disconcerted about the ending to The Road Less Travelled/Three Steps Back. My first minor complaint is that I had to suspend my disbelief on a few occasions about everyone except Albus being unilaterally unpleasant at all times. People are dicks, but I really don't feel like everyone being terrible constantly and without reason is realistic and it jerked me out of the (otherwise wonderful) story more than once.

I, um. I'm not quite sure how to broach the other subject, so I'm just going to do it. I almost had to stop reading Three Steps Back at the end when it suddenly and abruptly took a political, anti-abortion angle. Maybe you weren't intending to make a statement or anything, but I found myself cringing through the last bits because I still wanted to find out how everything ended after investing so much time. It was really jarring, somehow, and left me feeling vaguely ill. I felt like I had loved the fic to bits until reaching the end, and then it ended on a much more negative note. I'm sorry for saying all of this--you are a wonderful writer, and I'm not trying to be a bully. I just wanted to have somewhere to talk about the fact that it bothered me.

I don't want to end on such a negative note, so let me just say that I really do ADORE your writing! Thank you for your stories, and I'll keep reading in the future!
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on August 19th, 2011 10:24 pm (UTC)
Hi! Thanks for taking the time to post, and for planning to keep reading despite your misgivings! (To be honest, in similar circumstances ... I wouldn't.)

I don't really have any apologia for making my characters dickheads. Maybe it's the nature of my job, or the high pressure high competitive environment I studied in for so long, but there's nothing like stress or sickness to bring out people's inner dickheads. And everyone has one. Everyone. If you're lucky you spend most of your time in a setting that's not conducive to exposing said inner dickheads, but I don't. So yeah, people kind of suck, the end, is my literary theory of the day TM. :P

Your next issue really surprised me! Bear in mind that I wrote this fic what, four years ago?, and I CANNOT ACTUALLY REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED OMG except I gave Albus an immunosuppressive disease from dragon shit? And Rose and Hugo were mean instead of perfect children of light (which, I never write kids like that anyway. Kids are small adults, and see above as to my argument on that). I remember making Rose pregnant but did she keep the baby?! You'd think I'd know without checking. You would be wrong. Anyway, IRL I am massively, massively pro-choice to the point where if it was possible to institute some kind of biological barrier to prevent people having children without proving they'd be halfway decent at it, I'd go for it guns blazing. (You may have also heard that I'm not such a fan of ye olde religion either, which obviously ties in with that.) I'm not actually sure where the anti-abortion slant came in, unless it's that Rose kept the baby? I don't have time right now to check and now I'm not sure I want to. :( My old stuff can be embarrassing but I didn't realise it could be this bad.

Anyway, thank you again for commenting! And if you do keep reading, I hope you find something you like better. ♥