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16 April 2005 @ 06:21 pm
No, I like a hand with all its fingers on  

A pleasant day, today. My father tried to set me up with the piano tuner.

DAD: He's quite young, only about twenty.

ME: Twenty is far too ol-- ohmygill, it's not. *is traumatised. highly*

Now, a car-crash in writing! Because catsmeat laughed out loud at Wizards Abroad in a library, but mainly because he's a persistent bugger. I take no responsibility for harm caused from reading the following, my vewy fwist fanfwic.

Professor Dumbledore lived in the heart of the country, not miles but ten minutes from the nearest railway station (at Hogsmeade). He had no wife (that we know of) and lived in a very large house -- called Hogwarts -- with about a hundred servants (called house-elves).

-- -- This is in comparison to Professor Kirke, who lived in the country ten miles from the nearest railway station, with no wife, a housekeeper called Mrs Macready and three servants.

In the house, in which lived a number of students, because it was a school, there were possibly quite a few people called Peter (such as Wormtail), Susan (there was a Susan Bones), Edmund and Lucy. However our story is concerned with three notorious students called Harry, Ron, and Hermione (duh...or else it wouldn't be a HP fanfic, would it?)

At the moment, they were sitting in the Gryffindor common room.

"What was that noise?" said Hermione.

"It's only a bird, silly," said Ron.

"It's an owl. This is a wonderful place for birds," said Harry casually.

"It is? Says who?" said Ron, frowning.

"Says me," said Harry forcefully. "Wanna make something of it?"

"Guys, shut up," Hermione interrupted. "It was my turn ages ago! Here goes: 'Did you see those mountains --' "

"They're a little hard to miss," Harry muttered.

"I heard that! I'm not finished!" Hermione exclaimed. "Listen: 'And the woods. There might be eagles. There might be stags. There'll be hawks'. Wait for it!" And she composed her face into an expression of extreme pleasure. "'Badgers! Foxes! Rabbits!'"

"You forgot vicious, bloodthirsty centaurs, Hagrid's half-brother, giant spiders and other various but unspecified but hideous creatures," said Harry helpfully.

"Et cetera, et cetera," Ron added.

"Look," said Hermione in a pained voice, "I didn't write the bloody script. This was set in a time when kids actually were into nature and that kind of shit, okay?"

"When was that, exactly?" asked Ron, interested.

'Nobody knows!' said Hermione. 'It's a state secret. The information won't be released until 2098, according to 'Hogwarts: A History'.'

'Kids actually preferred talking about badgers to sex, then?' said Harry in a tone of disbelief.

'It was a repressed time, Harry,' said Hermione reprovingly. 'It is time to go to bed,' she added, whipping out her copy of 'The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe'.

'That sounds good to me!' said Harry. 'With you, is it?'

'Harry!' said Hermione, scandalised. 'We are trying to preserve some historical accuracy here! People get thrown out of Narnia for that sort of thing! Remember what happened to Susan?'

'What?' Harry asked.

'She got chucked out, 'cause she started wearing lipstick then when the train crashed and they all died she wasn't on it,' said Ron under his breath.

Harry pondered this for a moment.

'I am definitely going to have to start thinking about drag,' he said.


The next day it was raining.

'Of course it would be raining,' said Harry.

'Yes, duh, we are somewhere in the north of Scotland. It's like Ireland in that sense -- eventually, it will always rain,' said Seamus. (Seamus is only a 2D insert for the very simple reason that he is -- unfortunately for him -- from Ireland and thus able to contribute this thoughtful witticism. As far as I can tell he has no other purpose to this story -- but when does he ever?)

'Do stop grumbling, Harry,' said Hermione. 'Ten to one it'll clear up in an hour or so. And in the meantime we're pretty well off. There's a wireless and lots of books.'

Harry and Ron gave her the sort of look reserved for alcoholics insisting that a pink elephant playing the tuba is getting off in the bathroom. These were their general thoughts:

1. Hasn't she realised yet she's the only person here who finds books interesting?

2. Why is she speaking like that? Did someone slip a tab of E into her kippers this morning?

3. A wireless what?

'Not for me,' Ron said slowly, reading from his copy of TLTWATW. 'I am going to explore the -- look, let's cut to the chase here. We are trying to find a bloody great wardrobe full of dead animals skins so that we can, correct me if I'm wrong, find a doorway to another world, right?'

'Yes, but Ron, we had another four pages before we do that!' said Hermione in an aggrieved tone.

'So? Let's go find it then. I'm only here because I'm missing Divination,' said Ron.

'It's in our dorm, Ron, you great prat,' said Harry.

'Who are you calling a prat?' said Ron menacingly.

'You, because you are,' replied Harry infuriatingly. 'Where else are there wardrobes? And we can't get into Hermione's dorm, remember, unless you've had a sex change that you're keeping very quiet.'

'All right, all right, what's up your nose anyway?' said Ron, blushing hideously.

'Oh, it might be the fact that you fancy Hermione but instead of doing anything about it -- like snogging her -- you moon around and give out when Krum has parchment sex with her,' said Harry.

'What's your problem? Do you fancy her or something?' said Ron, going red at the eyeballs (makes a change from the ears, no?)

'Yes, I do -- according to H/Hr shippers. I also get off for Ginny, Luna, numerous and irritating Mary Sues, Draco, Parvati, Lavender, Seamus, Neville, Dean and, in a very twisted universe, Severus Snape,' said Harry.

'What about in this particular fic?' said Ron with interest.

'How do I know? I can't read the author's mind,' snapped Harry. 'This isn't Sophie's World!

Hermione, who had been waiting with a look of glazed anticipation on her face, pushed open the door of a cloak cupboard in the corner of the common room. Unsurprisingly it was filled with moth-eaten fur cloaks.

'Oh, golly, full of fur cloaks,' she said in a bored voice.

They pushed through the cloaks to reveal a landscape of white snow with a lamppost in the middle. Ron made to shut the door behind them.

'Don't, Ron,' said Hermione in a monotone. 'We know that it is a very silly thing to shut oneself in a wardrobe.'

The first thing they saw under the lamppost was Dobby the house-elf. He was struggling with a large black umbrella and a pile of parcels wrapped in brown paper (and liberally decorated with pictures of Harry's face). A long red muffler appeared to be choking him. When he spotted the trio he dropped his load and was immediately pulled to the ground as he was standing on the muffler, which then tightened like a noose. Ron and Harry made bemused faces at each other. They looked around for Hermione, but she was leaning against a tree smoking a cigarette with a bored expression on her face.

'Good evening,' said Ron sadistically.

'What did you say that for, you wanker? It's the middle of the morning!' said Harry. 'Wait -- are we on a different time frame here?'

'No,' said Ron. 'It says it here in the bloody book.'

'Goodness gracious me, sirs!' said Dobby, who was a little behind on the script. 'Sir, forgive me, are you a Daughter of Eve?' he said to Ron.

'My mum's name is Molly,' said Ron, confused.

'And here I was thinking Molly only had one daughter,' said Harry under his breath.

'A Son of Adam! And another Daughter of Eve!' said Dobby, bowing to Ron and Hermione, and getting a little out of breath. 'May I ask, sirs and mam, Daughters of Eve x2 and Son of Adam, how you came to be here in Narnia?'

'Through the bloody door,' said Harry.

'Oh,' said Dobby, a little put out. He flicked rapidly through his copy of TLTWATW. 'Eternal summer -- no -- Spare Oom -- didn't say that either -- ah yes! How would it be if you came and had tea with me?'

'We ought to be getting back --' Ron began, but Hermione elbowed him in the ribs.

'Stop wasting time,' she hissed. 'Dobby, we'll skip the whole cake and sardines thing. Just tell us about the White Witch.'

'Right...' Dobby muttered. 'Ok...I am a bad house-elf -- well everyone knew that already, I have low self-esteem, all right? I'm in the service of the White Witch to kidnap kids and bring them to her -- except Dumbledore the bastard brought in Stranger Danger, I hope he's realised just how hard he's made my job! -- and she makes it always winter and never Christmas! Think of that! Sirs and mam.'

'Gosh,' said Hermione in an apathetic voice.

'Aussies live with that the whole time and you don't hear them complaining,' said Harry, frowning.

'Well, this is Narnia, not Australia, got it, kid?' said Dobby, pointing his umbrella at Harry.

'All right, all right! We've got that loud and clear!' said Harry, with his hands up.

'Let's cut the crap, okay?' said Hermione. 'We're skipping to Chapter Four. Ron, we'll hide behind this tree to give you quality time with the Witch.'

'Why me?' Ron whined.

'Because you're the token idiot of the party,' said Harry, grinning evilly.

Ron was left standing in the clearing alone. He huffed and crossed his arms, slouching.

The White Witch zoomed up in a pearl-white snowmobile.

'What happened to the sled with the reindeer?' asked Ron disapprovingly.

'Gotta move with the times, honey!' the Witch boomed, rubbing her stubble with one hand and adjusting her wig.

'Ohmigod!' whispered Hermione behind the tree. 'It's Voldie in drag!'

'But what are you, honey?' said the Witch, moving closer and wiggling her hips suggestively. 'Aside from majorly hot, that is?'

Ron gulped.

'Are you an overgrown dwarf that has cut off its sexy sexy beard?' cooed the Witch seductively.

'No, I'm a boy, but I've been trying to get a beard for ages to impress Hermione. I find Mrs Skower's Tonic for Late Bloomers really --' Ron coughed and stopped.

'Well, I,' bellowed the Witch, 'am a Queen!'

'That's for sure,' whispered Harry.

'Uh, I mean, I am the Queen of Narnia!' the Witch recovered quickly. 'And I can see that you are an idiot, whatever else you may be --'

'Ha, I told you so,' said Harry smugly.

'Who said that? Who keeps making these annoying little inserts?' roared the Witch.

'That would be Harry,' said Ron.

'WHAT? My arch-nemesis, Harry POTTER?'

'Yes, Voldie, it's me,' said Harry resignedly, stepping out from behind the tree and pointing his wand.

'Well Harry, old chap? How's tricks?' said Voldemort, aka the White Witch of Narnia, aka Jadis.

'What? Why aren't you in canon character?' asked Harry, frowning.

'This is fanon, Harry!' cried Voldie. 'Embrace the difference! Try new things! Live a little! I, for example, have made quite the dictatorship here in Narnia. Admittedly I only have this piece of land with the inexplicable lamppost, and true, Dobby is my only subject, I mean slave, but house-elves like being slaves!'

Ron and Harry looked around for Hermione, but she was leaning against a tree smoking a cigarette, with a bored expression on her face.

'But look!' Voldie continued in delight. He grabbed up Dobby's package and noticed Harry's face. 'Urg, Dobby, you go too far. Anyway, his ears aren't that big.' He ripped it open to reveal lurid green robes made of a very-high-dragon's skin.

'My own range of dress robes!' he crowed. 'They're called "Voldemort's Secret". Very popular with the ladies --' He tipped a wink to Ron, who blushed in confusion.

'Who aren't ladies?' said Hermione.

'You aren't the cleverest witch in your year for nothing, Hermy dear,' said Voldie. She frowned in disgust.

'Duh, I so copy off Draco the whole time,' she said.

'Oh, is that why you spend so much time with him? Copying his notes and stuff?' asked Ron.

'No,' said Hermione. 'I perform sexual favours on him in return for cheating off him. Again, duh.'

'Oh!' said Ron. 'Foiled again, dammit!'

'Well dears, I really must dash -- over there,' Voldie simpered. 'I'm starting a new range for the "converted", to ease them in, you know.' He leaned in towards Ron. 'If you're interested, you know where to find me! Oh, you hot thing!' He flounced away behind the lamppost.

Ron, Harry and Hermione remained standing, looking around suspiciously. Voldie poked his head around the post. 'Honey pies, that is your cue to vamoose, comprennez?'

'I think he wants us to leave,' said Ron.

'Naw, you don't say?' said Harry sarcastically. They tramped back across the small patch of snow, through the mouldy cloaks and into the deserted common room.

'Ron --' said Hermione, turning to look at him with a bewildered expression on her face. 'What was all that innuendo about --'

She was shoved aside as Harry launched himself on Ron and started snogging him noisily.

He broke away for a second to yell, 'You know all my bitchiness earlier? That was just a repression of my uncontrollable passion for you! I mean, my controllable-up-until-five-second-ago passion for you! You dig that, right?' Loud snogging resumed.

'Harry, no!' Hermione screamed. 'This is not a slash fic!'

'Don't sweat it, Hermione,' said Ron, extricating himself with difficulty. 'Different sex isn't slash!'

'Ron, it's you snogging him, not me,' said Hermione, rolling her eyes.

'Yes -- but I had a sex change!' Ron exclaimed, ripping open the front of his robes. Harry and Hermione regarded his chest for a few seconds.

'Ew, Ron, put them away,' said Hermione. 'I'm going to class.'

'You're just jealous!' Ron yelled at her retreating back, over the sounds of Harry slurping his neck. Hermione looked back for a second and then climbed straight out of the portrait hole with a thoughtful look on her face.

In the corridor she bumped straight into a certain blonde someone we all know and love/hate (delete appropriate).

'Draco!' Hermione exclaimed in delight. 'Just the sex object I was hoping to see. Ron's just given me some ideas...'


If you would prefer something microscopically more intelligent, there's always my rant on Cho. *shrugs*

Back in the day, I used to have to start essays with some kind of inane introduction, like: ‘Silas Marner was written by George Eliot. It is set in the era of the Napoleonic wars and tells the story of a weaver called Silas who is the biggest, most boring git in the history of literature and Georgie should have done us a favour and had him stab himself with his own spindle in Chapter Two. It did serve a purpose in terms of a warm-up the main event -- ie, repeating other people’s opinions in a sufficiently long-winded manner so as to earn the ten marks per paragraph.

I’m at a loss here, so I’m just going to outline what -- to me -- are obvious points.

I like Cho’s character. I don’t feel that attached to her as a person in her own right, but for the part she plays in the books I respect and admire her.

I think Harry/Cho was the best het ship to happen in the books. Everything else is just a toy given or shipping.

Their Seeker, Cho Chang, was the only girl in their team. She was shorter than Harry by about a head, and Harry couldn’t help noticing, nervous as he was, that she was extremely pretty. She smiled at Harry as the teams faced each other behind their captains, and he felt a slight jolt in the region of his stomach that he didn’t think had anything to do with nerves.

-- Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, ‘Gryffindor versus Ravenclaw’

That’s all we’re getting in terms of Harry’s attitude towards Cho. I reckon -- whether or not I’m right, it’s my opinion and, as my friend always told me whenever she lost an argument to me, you can’t say opinion is wrong! Neenaw -- this description set people against her from the outset. I’ll leave aside people who think OHMYGILL HARRY AND HERMIONE/GINNY/HEDWIG ARE SOUL-MATES, because they’re already biased. Lookit, though: ‘pretty’. Oh, no! Harry Potter, the savior of wizardkind, the almighty Boy Who Lived to be a Birrova Git, Really, But We Like Him Anyway is fancying someone based on their looks.

This is where JK shows her consummate skill, I feel -- or at least her knowledge of teenaged boys. Harry would have to be a much deeper person than he is to look beyond surface appearance, particularly at thirteen. Millicent may have this totally attractive pancreas, but Harry just ain’t appreciatin’. Moreover, he doesn’t dwell on this odd feeling he harbours for Cho -- for about a minute. He just gets a jolt of ‘Ooh, me likey’ and then his attention is back on the game -- re-iterating the ‘love is of a man’s life a thing apart’ theory.

Introducing a new female participant at this stage was, for me, quite a surprise. I ‘knew’ Harry would never end up with Hermione. -- This, mark you, is before I found the fandom and realised people, uh, do actually support this ship… -- It was just too obvious, too predictable -- as I put it when I was fifteen and knew one other person in the world who’d read the books, JK had to leave the way open for Harry to hook up with Voldemort’s daughter or something. -- Again before I realised that there is a plethora of Suethors devoted to the very thing. -- I just assumed that Harry would eventually get together with Ginny, simply because she fancied him, he’s a bit thick when it comes to romantic matters and there was no other female around that wasn’t related to him or a bazillion years too old for him. -- I don’t know, I’m a slasher -- are there people who deal in, like, Harry/McGonagall? As a counterpart to, say, Harry/Snape? Oh, dear me, I feel quite faint. NURSE, THE SCREENS! --

The thing I liked most about Cho, though, was that she was the archetypal older woman. I think it was quite keen of JK to write her so and I’ve said as much before. It makes her stand out a bit. It also challenges what, up to then, had been Harry’s sort of omnipotence. He’d fought Voldemort and saved the school and whatnot twice by the time when he met her; his biggest fan was a younger girl who hero-worshipped him. Harry wouldn’t be Harry if he didn’t rise to challenges. It’s why Voldemort can get to him so easily. I couldn’t believe it when Harry actually went to the Ministry at the end of OotP; ‘What an APE’ were, I believe, the words going through my head on reading that. There you go, though; that’s Harry. This -- shall we call it foolhardiness? -- also applies to his love-life. Cho is a challenge.

Cho was a year older than he was; she was very pretty; she was a very good Quidditch player, and she was also very popular.

-- Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, The Unexpected Task

It’s these things in combination that make Cho fascinating to Harry. Let’s contrast it to Ginny, for example: Ginny was a year younger than he was; she was pretty, presumably, but not so’s Harry ever noticed; her Quidditch skills had yet to come to light and there is no evidence that she hangs around with anyone but Colin Creevey. Mmm. I wonder…

Cho’s refusal to go to the Ball with him only upped the ante. I don’t for a minute think that Cho was very much different to the other girls who wanted to go to the Ball with Harry because of his fame. In fact, I don’t think she understood him at all, given their misunderstandings in OotP. The key point, though, is not what Cho felt for him; and I think it’s fair to admit that she did fancy him, although to no deeper level than his fame, his Quidditch skills, his bravery and perhaps some kind of superficial psychical attraction. -- After all, we never hear Harry described as ‘good-looking’ in canon. -- No, it’s what Harry felt for her that counts -- and he fancied her. She turned him down. Cue heightened interest in her charms. Darlin’ Harry isn’t used to being foiled.

Perhaps I was lucky. I didn’t get into the fandom until after OotP came out. I wasn’t prejudiced by my shipping, which I certainly will be come July sixteenth this year. As such, when I read OotP, I was still innocent of slash and happy to read whatever pairings JK put forward. I’m a sucker for romantic entanglements of any sort and I swallowed Harry/Cho hook, line and sinker. I think Harry’s feelings of embarrassment when he encountered Cho in OotP were exceedingly well-delineated. The course of true love ne’er did run smooth. Poor Harry seemed to be falling into potholes every time he turned around. Getting covered in Stinksap when she called in to his train compartment? His best friend telling her off for her Quidditch alliances? Brilliant.

The Kiss. I loved it. Without a doubt it is my favourite part of all the books. Mainly because, well, it’s a kiss! I love readin’ ’em. In real fiction, in fan fiction, kisses -- particularly of the first kiss variety -- are mah kink, as everyone knows.

She was much too close. He could see every tear clinging to her eyelashes…

-- Harry and the Order of the Phoenix, The Eye of the Snake

So much left to the imagination! I cheered! I re-read it over and over and, for variety, over. The interaction between Harry, Ron and Hermione was brilliant too. There were no angels or trumpets but it was realistic -- insofar as ‘wet’ went, anyway. *le snerk*

To the people who denigrate Cho for crying all the time in OotP -- um. Indeed, she is a crybaby.


HELLO? Hauling off and sporking her for THAT is just plain spiteful. I hope all those people, if the worst happens in their lives and their loved ones are killed in the most brutal manner possible, are able to rein in their tears and remember that people are going to hate them for it, yeah?

I’m probably also alone in liking the change in Ginny’s character. I don’t like fandom!Ginny in the slightest, but if I step back for a moment I can recall feeling a serious empathy for a girl sticking her elbow in a butter dish on spotting her pash. I don’t think for a moment that she’s over Harry -- she’s employing the tried and trusted method of ‘I don’t like you any more, but you’ll notice me now, won’t you?’. And he does. They also have something in common now -- Quidditch. I don’t think Harry greatly values extra-feminine females, particularly after his experiences with Cho. Ginny probably gets that too. That said, I can see Harry/Luna happen too; Harry has so much shadow in him that he needs someone who can think outside the box.

Because in the end, I don’t think JK is going to make my century and have Harry ride off into the sunset with Draco/Snape/Seamus/Neville/Ron/Dean/Fred/George/Moody -- have seen it, was too afraid to read it, I’m not a Gryffindor for a reason -- or, my current preference, Zacharias.

En finale -- Cho!hate, people? It’s totally unoriginal.

That's all, folks.

Current Mood: hungryhungry
Current Music: 'Michael,' Franz Ferdinand
Minnow: left-handed minnowminnow_53 on April 16th, 2005 11:32 am (UTC)
Hagrid's half-brother

*Confused* So it was post OoTP? Well, a million times better than a lot of the stuff I see on various comms. Very interesting, anyway. I do love HP/Narnia crossovers! Especially as I've never seen one before. Though the train crash has always left me cold.

Babbling. I like it. Don't like Cho - yet - but will read what you have to say.

every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:01 pm (UTC)
Yes, it was post OotP; I wasn't in the fandom before then!

It wasn't meant to be GOOD. You missed my post about it before -- it is truly dire, and I only put it up because Adam was pestering me.
A Better Word for Weird: emily amusementa_leprechaun on April 16th, 2005 11:51 am (UTC)
To the people who denigrate Cho for crying all the time in OotP -- um. Indeed, she is a crybaby.

Oh hell yes.
Mad props to JKR for not being afraid to have her characters act realistically.

Interesting point about Cho being a challenge--I never quite saw it that way.

The kissing scene was beautiful. :) I've re-read that one several times.

Harry/Ginny possibility: Hmm. I've heard several sides of this. Personally I think it's still a good possibility, and others would agree with me. But a few others have said that it would degrade Ginny's character for them to learn she wasn't over Harry yet.
Although this may just be another instance of the characters acting like, I dunno, people. XD I know how long it takes to get over an unrequited crush, believe me. We may not have seen the last of Ginny Weasley.

Harry/Luna possibility: This pairing makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. But that doesn't mean I think there's a good chance of it...
Would like to see it, though. :) And if it DOES happen, then I will fall head-over-heels for it and it will become my Harry Potter OTP. Would be just like Ben/Sofie in Carnivàle ::squishes::
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:06 pm (UTC)
Cho the Challenge -- not in the sense that she's a challenging person, I guess, more that she was sort of different? Arg, watching the Virgin Suicides has done nothing for my petit logic.

But a few others have said that it would degrade Ginny's character for them to learn she wasn't over Harry yet.

*is thoughtful* That's an interesting view. I mean, I'm not a H/G shipper, or a het shipper at all really, so I don't know their trends. But if they are shipping them, how do they intend to get them together? Ginny revisiting her crush in future? I think that's a little silly.

I can see Luna and Harry being good friends until Harry's death at the end of Book seven. No, seriously. I think he has a very short shelf-life!
Minnow: minnowmoonstarminnow_53 on April 16th, 2005 11:53 am (UTC)
Obviously post-OoTP, now I've read the rest.

You make interesting points about Cho, especially the 'older woman' one, which has always fascinated me. I feel JKR's conscious didn't have much say in this. And - this has happened to me, and perhaps to you - I thought that JKR meant them to have chemistry, meant them to get off together...then it just didn't work. Sparks failed to fly. Again, her conscious had nothing to do with it. The characters decided.

None of this means I like Cho. The reason? The way she defended Marietta, and derided Hermione, after Marietta betrayed the DA group. I think that alone is enough to make Cho worthy of disdain, frankly. And this is actually what JKR meant us to feel, I think, once the spark failed to ignite. Though there are huge amounts of subtext - jealousy of Hermione, above all - the intention seems pretty clear to me. It was at this point that I stopped liking Cho, or feeling sorry for her in detail.



every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:10 pm (UTC)
*is curious* You mean JK never meant for sparks to fly, or she did and when it started writing it didn't happen? Oof, if the latter -- scary! Characters having that much power!

I think her loyalty to Marietta is justifiable. Think of it the other way -- if it had been Harry and Hermione, for example, no one would think less of Harry for defending Hermione. I'm not at all sure what JK was trying to accomplish with the Hermione!jealousy -- taunt the H/Hr shippers and make the rest of us quiver in fear, p'raps? :)
(no subject) - minnow_53 on April 17th, 2005 12:27 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 17th, 2005 10:34 am (UTC) (Expand)
leialiai on April 16th, 2005 12:04 pm (UTC)
Oooh I have to agree about the Cho thing. I mean, I don't like her much, but come on people give her a break. She's 16, had her boyfriend murdered, I suspect she just wanted closure and got it mixed up with actually fancing Harry a bit. So she's a normal teenage girl. But, she's part of the books, a necessary part, and one the books would be very bare without.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:11 pm (UTC)
I agree; as Harry's first love-interest, it certainly wasn't easy but it wasn't boring either. Still, it's odd that there's no one out there having them get back together; clearly, the het-love runs to Ginny, Hermione, Tonks etc. xD
balfrog on April 16th, 2005 12:40 pm (UTC)
Piano tuner, huh? was he pretty?
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:12 pm (UTC)
Didn't see! was cleaning bathroom.
(no subject) - balfrog on April 16th, 2005 03:26 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:33 pm (UTC) (Expand)
denial_girldenial_girl on April 16th, 2005 01:49 pm (UTC)
I was always kinda meh about Cho. I mean, I never liked her but I didn't have any hard-core hate. Although, I did find her very annoying in OotP. Okay, her boyfriend was murdered and everything, but why go out with Harry if she's obviously still not over it? And doesn't she know Harry is a doof when it comes to girls? He barely managed to ask her to the ball in GoF, he's hardly the cassanova to say all the right comforting things. I think Cho put him in a tough place unfairly.

On the other hand, I never thought Cho and Harry would ever end up as anything anyway. A crush, maybe a little fling, but never a girlfriend. The key tip-off for me was that she was a year older because even if they did hook up seriously for a year or two, she wouldn't be at Hogwarts for book 7, leaving the door wide open. And why set up a romance if the girl can't be in the majority of the final book?

Plus there was Ginny, whom I still assume will end up with Harry. Ron is even on the ship now, it's a forgone conclusion. I definitely like the way she's maturing. I don't think Ginny is 100% over Harry but she's accepted being his friend and is totally cool with that.

Sorry but I don't see Harry/Luna happening this side of the internet. :)
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:19 pm (UTC)
Yes, that is one thing that makes no sense. She totally gave herself no time to get over Cedric. He died in June; in September she was giving Harry the eye. It was obviously some kind of displacement syndrome or a morbid type of rebound.

Yes, I was never sure that Cho was going to be long-term, mainly because, I suppose, I just always saw Harry and Ginny getting together, when Ginny got courage and Harry just realised, because that is what HAPPENS in books. At least Luna creates some tension -- she fancies Ron, who fancies Hermione, who fancies Krum, who fancies Harry...I mean...*slaps down inner slasher*
(no subject) - much_reality on April 16th, 2005 03:31 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:35 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - much_reality on April 16th, 2005 03:41 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:58 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Insufferable, man.: billiecynicalpirate on April 16th, 2005 03:23 pm (UTC)
'How do I know? I can't read the author's mind,' snapped Harry. 'This isn't Sophie's World!'

Er, just cause it's my name? And you have read Sophie's World! *high-fives* It's not that good a book, is it?

You know, I found that Baby's First Steps-type fic funny. And a little crazy, and perhaps profit-making from a shrink's point of view, but anyway. You clearly had Teh Wit when you were just a nipper, and could snark about teh fandom and stuff like nobody's business. Even if it was a tad less subtle than you are now (you Death Eater, you).

Also, Harry/Ron. *surprisingly pleased sigh*
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 03:45 pm (UTC)
I have read it (dude, make reference to a book I haven't read? Fie!). I've also read Through A Glass, Darkly (which has to be the best title ever) and The Christmas Mystery. I quite like SW, a bit heavy on the ol' philosophy; but at least I know something about it now and also, it gave me nightmares for weeks, which is quite the achievement!

Funny? Funny-looking...ahaha. Yes, see, the idea of 'subtlety' entirely passed me by and emigrated to another country. The lack of having read Pterry was telling, for I was not a natural at the extension of metaphors...*sniff, sniff*

I'd do it more often, but that would leave Draco and Zacharias and Hermione out in the cold. :)
Jax: david thewlis behold pornimadra_blue on April 16th, 2005 04:22 pm (UTC)
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 16th, 2005 04:34 pm (UTC)
OH! Well! That explains the drive-by review I got today. *beams*

Although...they quoted the end! Isn't that kind of spoiling it?

AH, I DON'T CARE! *hugs*
(no subject) - geoviki on April 16th, 2005 07:25 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - geoviki on April 16th, 2005 07:33 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 17th, 2005 11:55 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 17th, 2005 11:52 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - ackonrad on April 17th, 2005 08:55 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 17th, 2005 10:07 am (UTC) (Expand)
kabeyk on April 16th, 2005 04:54 pm (UTC)
Yay, this all looks interesting! Did I see the word Narnia in there? Heh. Still, just got back from work and have to return there in less than 12 hours so I'll read it later. Remind me if I forget. And poor Cho; I mean, she's a bit annoying, but then aren't most people?

Argh! Our piano tutor is about forty and takes his girlfriend/sidekick everywhere he goes. I'm sure yours is lovely though. Very useful type of boyfriend. Er, good with his hands or something, you should try him.

Oh god; I need some sleep. Sorry.

every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 17th, 2005 10:31 am (UTC)
Remind me if I forget.

No way. This was a travesty.

And poor Cho; I mean, she's a bit annoying, but then aren't most people?

You summed up my whole rant in one line, DAMN YOU.

Even on lj people are taking pity on me and trying to set me up...*bewails cruel cruel fate*
(no subject) - kabeyk on April 18th, 2005 10:57 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 18th, 2005 11:09 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - kabeyk on April 18th, 2005 11:39 am (UTC) (Expand)
someone's always looking for DB Cooper: samurai04 by pale_beauty_numena on April 16th, 2005 11:00 pm (UTC)
HP/Narnia crossover! *dies* That was great! That was your first fic? Sheesh, you should see the one and only fic I wrote when I was fifteen - takes "Absolutely Horrible" to a whole new level.

Hmm..I like your rant on Cho, I've never understood why people hated her - is she my favorite character? No. Heck, she's not even my favorite female character, but I don't hate her. I agree with you, Cho is just a girl like millions of others, I think she's rather...emblematic of what I like so much about the entire series - namely that it's not a fairy tale, for all the demons and goblins and wizards the characters are just people (even when they aren't technically). Harry isn't your arch-typical hero, he's an angsty teenager with hormones and a bitchy attitude (which is why I love him so much). *grin* I think JKR really hit people over the head with that in the fifth book (that, of course, is why it's my favorite).

As for Ginny, you're definitely not alone in liking the change in her character. She became so much more interesting in the fifth book.

Mmm..am so tired now, hope that made some vague sort of sense. *stumbles off to bed*

every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 17th, 2005 11:39 am (UTC)
Great? No, no, no. Greatly BAD, mayhap. :)

what I like so much about the entire series - namely that it's not a fairy tale, for all the demons and goblins and wizards the characters are just people (even when they aren't technically). Harry isn't your arch-typical hero

He's not even an anti-hero. He's Just Harry. xD

That is precisely what enamoured me of the books also. It's like goblins are accountants and gnomes are household pets and fairies are just silly insects...just like our world, really, only with magic!
(Deleted comment)
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 17th, 2005 11:36 am (UTC)
Yes, you're right about the foiling bit! *facepalm* Can you see why I learned off other people's points for school essays? :)

Right up to the train I thought they had a chance. But the bit with Ron and Ginny just sealed the finito on H/C, for me.

I actually thought that added to its charm! It is quite difficult to write a realistic, erotic kiss.

I think the main argument against her is the huge change in personality, rather than a hatred of the personality itself. ?
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 17th, 2005 02:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Insufferable, man.cynicalpirate on April 18th, 2005 02:23 pm (UTC)
Er, was just about to comment on a new entry, but I think it has disappeared slightly. Have you deleted it? Are you OK? *frets*

(Lol, look at me stressing.)

Something that I very tentatively offer to cheer you up: the updated Big Bang H/D. And I have thought of some titles;

Eyeliner and Broken Promises


How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love cynicalpirate

Neither of those are serious suggestions, love.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 21st, 2005 07:19 am (UTC)
You always seem to get stuck reading my pre-deleted angst, do not you? *pets*

Something with 'Eyeliner' would actually be cool, although the second title ROCKS. :)
henbock on April 19th, 2005 02:38 am (UTC)
hi im gla doyu got that out of the way and I think that people hate Chp is because they are jealous of her as it is ahe that Harry fancies and everyone wishes it was them that he fancied! Hope you had a nice birthday! Sorry for letting you down!

every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 21st, 2005 07:20 am (UTC)
*is puzzled* Reason for big white space?

Lord Marmaduke Newbrycatsmeat on April 19th, 2005 03:41 pm (UTC)
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 21st, 2005 07:21 am (UTC)
(no subject) - catsmeat on April 21st, 2005 08:14 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 21st, 2005 01:03 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - catsmeat on April 21st, 2005 04:26 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 22nd, 2005 03:01 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - catsmeat on April 23rd, 2005 10:58 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 23rd, 2005 11:23 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - catsmeat on April 25th, 2005 03:23 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - scoradh on April 26th, 2005 02:40 am (UTC) (Expand)
Liz_eliza_b on April 22nd, 2005 12:37 pm (UTC)
This is kinda late, but oh well...

Even if this was your first fic, it's really clever, and about a million times better than the typical story from this fandom. There're so many great touches: you moon around and give out when Krum has parchment sex with her, and that sort of thing. Plus, you didn't abuse the English language (not that you ever would, but a lot of new writers seem to. *sniff*).

Yay, other people enjoyed it when Harry and Cho got together. I figured that was just me being girly...but it was really sweet. As you say, romance in books is really alluring, especially when those involved are as clueless as Harry & Co.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on April 22nd, 2005 03:05 pm (UTC)
Thanks, love! It still makes me cringe the Cringe o' DOOM, but I think what I found worst about it, reading back, is that it sounds as if I hate the two sets of books! *shakes head*

Yes, I liked it too. I always swallowed writers' pairings; the idea of changing them to ones I preferred never, ever occured to me until I found the fandom. xD