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08 May 2005 @ 05:40 pm
If god wanted us to fly, he would have given us tickets  

About a week ago, my Australian cousin had a baby girl. She’s twenty-three -- my cousin, not that baby, although if the latter wouldn’t that sentence have been, like, so amusing?! Rona -- my cousin -- only got married last year; she called her daughter Imogen, which is a good deal better than Charnie, I must say. That’s what my other cousin, who got married at twenty-one and had a baby at twenty-two, called her eldest daughter. I’m really quite scared, to be honest -- returning home at the age of nineteen, by these standards, I should have a fiance in tow or even a bun in the oven.

Anyway, my mother bought a card for Rona and made me write it, because I’m always made write cards and draw pictures on the envelopes and stuff. Presumably my mother thinks the recipient of these cards will find it charming as opposed to, eg, psycho and deluded. This is what I wrote for Rona:

Dear Rona, Daniel and baby Imogen,

Congratulations for bringing the second great-grand-child into the world! In the manner of fairy godmothers, we wish her every possible grace, beauty, wit and charm, as well as other, more prosaic gifts -- such as being good at sums, ‘cause that’s always useful -- for the rest of her long life.

Much love, the Irish expatriates

There was also a silhouette of a baby in a buggy at the bottom of the card; it was wearing what I presumed to be a bobble hat. I drew an arrow to it and added the thoughtful communiqué: I hope she doesn’t have an alien tentacle, though!

My mother split her sides laughing, although it wasn’t exactly me on top comic form, was it? It will pass entirely over Rona’s head, in any case. I thought it was at least better than saying: ‘You had a baby. Um, wow. The next eighteen years of your life are going to be sheer hell. Love and drugs, a family whose eldest child is nearly got rid of -w00t!!’.

cynicalpirate and chowburger -- ohmygill, Vanessa! I actually felt sorry for her...

 
 
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: 'Yellow', Coldplay
 
 
 
starts with kanyotherknight on May 8th, 2005 09:55 am (UTC)
It's from Orson Scott Card's new book, Shadow of the Giant.

I've got the beta, and I thank you immensely. I'm running through it right now.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on May 8th, 2005 10:02 am (UTC)
Oh, I've heard about that... sci-fi's not my thang, though.

*hides* Don't hate me after!!
starts with kanyotherknight on May 8th, 2005 10:18 am (UTC)
You should still read Ender's Game, at least.

It would be fairly hypocritical of me to hate you for a simple -- ruthless -- beta that showed and affinity for all-caps. I seem to remember outing my masochistic tendencies and telling you to 'fire at will'.

It's just destabilizing running through three betas who contradict each other, especially on regional issues. You mentioned some of the contractions were Irish or archaic but I saw them as upper-Canadian -- which is wrong, anyway -- and someone else saw another problem entirely. It takes a bit running through each of them.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on May 8th, 2005 12:46 pm (UTC)
Yes, I don't really bother to parse my own grammar that much. :)

I find the same problem! I was wondering if there are connections between Canadian and Irish accents, because I read that Haydyn Christensen pronouces about 'aboot'. One beta says a line is good, another says cut it. In the end, go with your own intution -- because it is your story! :)
starts with k: ASTBanyotherknight on May 8th, 2005 12:53 pm (UTC)
You really shouldn't have said that, you know, because I'll go off on a linguistic rant if you aren't careful. The "aboot" thing is true, differing to certain degrees depending on where you are in Canada. But the contractions got me: Americans say "you haven't" and Canadians alternate between that and "you've not" -- usually the latter. Pathetic little me actually has a language notebook that is accompanying me to England and Scotland in July for further research.
every Starbucks should have a polar bearscoradh on May 9th, 2005 01:59 am (UTC)
You'll find that 'you've not' is very much an Irish, possibly Welsh thing. Even Scottish. However, neither Harry nor Draco is Scottish -- they're English. Particularly Draco, the pureblood, he'd use an upper-class 'rah' accent that would most certainly not incorporate the dialectism (not a word?!) of 'you've not', as opposed to 'you haven't'. It doesn't fit with Harry either. Only Seamus really would go for that variation. :D